LOVE IS AT STAKE :: A word of advice, on communication in your relationship..

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” When dealing with a difficult person, all that matters from a spiritual standpoint is how you react and treat the person. It’s not about getting the other person to change or agree with you. Your spiritual growth is all about the way that YOU deal with the relationship, the person, and the situation. Even if the situation would justify you acting harshly, resist this temptation. Ask for heaven to purify and uplift your thoughts and feelings so that everything you do and say is aligned with Divine Love. This is the path and purpose of the lightworker. This is why you are here. “
~ Doreen Virtue ~

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GREETINGS LOVER,

 

IF  YOU  ARRIVED  AT  THESE  WORDS  BECAUSE  YOU  ARE   CURRENTLY IN  (have been in..  or anticipate you may at some point find yourself in)   A  RELATIONSHIP  WHICH  STRUGGLES  WITH  COMMUNICATION, THEN YOU’VE ARRIVED  AT   THE TRANSITION  YOU HAVE BEEN  WAITING FOR !!!

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THE QUOTE YOU READ ABOVE IS ONE I WAS RECENTLY INTRODUCED TO BY A FRIEND OF MINE.   IT SPEAKS TO A  PRO-ACTIVE  MANNER  BY  WHICH  TO  CREATE  CHANGE, IN THE WAY  YOUR LOVED  ONE  RESPONDS  TO YOU.  THERE IS NO NEED TO PAY THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS INTO COUNSELING ONCE YOU’VE *GOTTEN  HOW TO TAP INTO  ANOTHER’S  PROCESS, TO THE  EFFECT OF  YOUR SHARED  DESIRES AND NEEDS.

(B-U-T)  IF  FOLLOWING  SUCH  ADVICE IS GOING  TO WORK  FOR YOU,  IT’S GOING TO TAKE YOU  REALLY HAVING  THE WANT FOR..   GOING TO TAKE YOU REALLY  BEING  READY, FOR  A CHANGE!

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> BECAUSE   AS  DOREEN INFERS,  -IT IS NOT- GOING TO BE ON  HIM/HER MAKING IT HAPPEN!   See if you want the kind of love and affinity in your relationship, that you’ve always dreamed of having.. the kind you once knew potential between the two of you, IT’S GOING TO HAVE TO *START*  WITH YOU.   STARTS WITH YOU.. ENDS WITH YOU, BOTH 🙂    REGARDLESS OF WHO IS RIGHT AND WHO IS WRONG!

..lay down your sword..

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WHAT YOU WANT TO DO IS GO INTO YOUR COMMON EVERYDAY COMMUNICATION WITH A NEW APPROACH.  NOTHING NEW IS EVER ACCOMPLISHED OUT OF  OLD WAYS  OF  GETTING THINGS DONE.   ..WHAT MOST OF US FAIL TO REALIZE IS THAT BEING IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEBODY  IS NOT SO MUCH  ABOUT H-A-V-I-N-G  A RELATIONSHIP WITH THAT PERSON, BUT   G R O W I N G   A RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM/HER.   EVEN AFTER THE FIRST YEAR, AFTER THE 5TH YEAR,  AFTER THE MARRIAGE CEREMONY…

AFTER ALL OUR EXPECTATIONS  FOR WHAT  BEING  ‘SETTLED‘  HAVE BEEN MET,  WE MUST CONTINUE TO LOOK FORWARD TO WHAT NEW EXPECTATIONS,  WHAT NEW BOUNDARIES AND FREEDOMS   WILL LOOK LIKE,   FEEL LIKE,   WORK LIKE.

ANTHONY HAVING A RELATIONSHIP WITH DENISE IS ONE THING.   

ANTHONY GROWING A RELATIONSHIP WITH DENISE IS QUITE ANOTHER.

((if you just caught yourself picturing a difference that distinguished a ‘growing relationship’ as something new and respective of an ongoing relationship, ACKNOWLEDGE for yourself, that you have been conditioned to accept that an ongoing relationship is different than a new one.  Then ask yourself.. why CAN’T my relationship be something new?  Everyday it continues into the future..))

^ do not disregard just because I’ve crossed it out.^

*never disregard what YOU’ve cross out, either* Think about that

YOU SEE THE MANNER IN WHICH EACH ONE OF US CONCEPTUALIZES THE RELATIONSHIPS WE’RE  IN,  SAYS A LOT ABOUT THE WAY WE TREAT THEM.  THERE IS A SPECIAL CONNECTION EXPRESSED, WHEN  OVER  A CONVERSATION AT THE COFFEE SHOP  ONE TELLS ANOTHER:

I GROW A MANGO TREE IN MY YARD” AS OPPOSED TO TELLING THEM YOU:  “HAVE A MANGO TREE” IN YOUR YARD.

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THERE ARE NUANCES OF NURTURING, TENDING TO, ATTENTION TOWARDS, CARE FOR… THAT ARE ABSENT WHEN ONE SIMPLY POSES TO POSSESS SOMETHING.

NOTICE THE (ing) AT THE END OF THE ADJECTIVES I JUST PRESENTED YOU..  THESE ARE  _ACTIVE_ WORDS.

IMAGINE ACTIVE LOVE…  I’M SURE YOUR LOVE HAS BEEN ACTIVE AT SOME POINT IN THE PAST.  I’M SURE THERE ARE TIMES EVEN, WHEN YOUR LOVE IS ACTIVE TODAY, AND YOU’RE JUST FIGURING OUT HOW TO KEEP THAT FLOWING MORE CONSISTENTLY.   ..HERE’S THE THING;  NOBODY OR NOTHING  CAN MAKE YOU ACTIVE!    Y O U  ACTIVATE YOURSELF!

NOW, SURE SOMEBODY CAN INSPIRE YOU INTO ACTION; AND THE MATTER MAY BE THAT YOU ARE FINDING THAT YOUR DIFFICULTY WITH YOUR LOVED ONE HASN’T BEEN VERY INSPIRING…

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>WELL  …CONSIDER THE FOLLOWING.  AND ONCE AGAIN, IF YOU ARE NOT PREPARED TO BE THE ONE TO HAVE TO APPROACH A CHANGE, THEN THIS IS SIMPLY ELOQUENT READING FOR YOU.   BUT PLEASE BELIEVE, THAT IF YOU’VE HAD ENOUGH, AND YOU JUST WANT YOUR HAPPINESS BACK…  YOU’RE GOING TO WANT TO READ THIS VERY METICULOUSLY, MAYBE READ EACH LINE TWICE SO THAT YOU CAN REALLY GET INSIDE OF YOURSELF TO  SEE IT.

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TAKE NOTE AND GIVE IT SOME PRACTICE:

 

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The more you *receive* their aggression, rather than *conflict* with it  (and by receive I do not mean accept it, but absorb and sit with it, committed to a breakthrough) ..the more you are acquainting yourself with being in their world. You are learning it; the space you have to stand in love, the distance, the length of time that at the moment (or at that time in their life) sits comfortable with them.
_Hang with me_
..You are not kowtowing to them, you are rather, *re-creating* them.  Just by being in the presence of what you’re generating, they become more pro-active in coming to you as you have been in going to them.
They have been tamed in the peace you stood for them having in your time together, and in reciprocation begin to show up in your world just as you had through your resilience struggling to find them;  feeling out for new boundaries in space, distance, time, in YOUR world
_You still with me?_
At some point you both discover what happiness really is together (some people are together 50 yrs before this occurs to them.. having thought plenty of times they were happy).
_keep hanging with me_
Happiness between two people is quite phenomenal, because it can only be absolute happiness (to whatever degree content upon) if it manifests as mutual, and for that to happen, like the conception of a child it’s got to be perfect.    Both your endeavors at that point have met at exactly the right time, distance, space, to strike the moment as exactly what you’ve been looking for.
_Got it?_
It all sounds utopic.. but this transformation for some happens once, for some it happens over and over again.
But ultimately it only happens for those who recognize that it CAN, and DOES happen; happens to us when we submit to the process which brings it to realization.
What’s the process??? submission itself.   ..When you are finally prepared to accept submission to love as a powerful sacrifice; the spirit of our divine has found its way around your heart.      ..That kind of power does not falter..
… 🙂 …
YOU
ARE
IN
COMMAND!!!
M A K E      M A G I C
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Tone.Are
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2 responses to “LOVE IS AT STAKE :: A word of advice, on communication in your relationship..

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